Change Your Thinking To Change Your Life

start thinking positive
Start thinking more positive

The Voice Inside My Head

We all have that small voice inside our head, with which we have a conversation and perform, what is called the “self-talk”. We all have a negative conversation with ourselves from time to time, which is normal for us humans to do.self talk to yourself

Some of us tend to do this more frequently than others and if you haven’t guessed it by now, it’s the successful people that tend to have a more positive conversation, compared to the unsuccessful ones.

Here are six main steps to achieving goals in life, of successful people’s self-talk conversations:

  1. Don’t beat yourself up – Instead of calling yourself names and criticize that last conversation you had with someone important, try moving on and focusing on your good qualities. Optimistic people don’t dwell on things too much and tend to enforce their strong points.
  2. Eliminate your past – Have you ever been told by someone that you were too fat or that you would never be a smart person during your school years? We all had some shameful talk from another person at some point in our lives, but that doesn’t mean we have to carry that load with us for the rest of our lives. Try proving them wrong, even if it’s decades later, or simply let go of them and don’t look back.
  3. Setbacks aren’t the end of the world – We have more choices than failing or succeeding. We don’t always realize that and actually tend to forget that there are also lessons in failures and mistakes that we make. When we set ourselves some new challenges or goals, we shouldn’t give up after our first failure. Instead we should look at our setback as a stepping stone. Success isn’t always easy but with enough trial and error, we can reach it!
  4. Don’t look at negativity as a snowball effect – I was once told that ‘all bad things happen in 3’. What usually happened then was that I was waiting for the second and third mishap to happen. If you have a negative mindset and you tell yourself that the next bad thing will happen any second, obviously you won’t feel very lucky or positive in general. Optimistic people look at challenges as individual ones. Take each challenge by the horns, one by one, instead of taking the whole hoard.

    start thinking positive
    Start thinking more positive
  5. Don’t make it your fault – I’m sure that when something goes wrong, that you were involved with, you either make it your fault by looking at it from your perspective, or someone tells you that you haven’t done it properly, which your self-talk then lets you believe it was your fault. You should instead open your eyes and look at the situation from other angles. Many people are often involved in actions. It’s highly unlikely that everything has gone wrong because of you. And even if it did, mistakes happen. It’s a human reaction to make mistakes, so don’t take it personal.
  6. “I forgive me” – High performers tend to forgive themselves. When things go wrong, when they make mistakes and when they can’t change the past, they simply forgive themselves and turn the page to a new chapter. Instead of calling yourself names, compliment yourself and learn from your mistakes. Its as simple as that!

So as you see, simple habits can improve your mentality quite drastically.

Not only will you be less stressed when things go wrong, you can now look at life in a more positive way.

This positivity will reflect a lot on your behavior and your actions.

Your successful work habits and quality of your work will increase and you won’t be as nervous to mess up next time, if you practice these simple 6 steps!

Where To Start

So if you want to become successful, emotional habits can play a big part in it. It is good for your health and for your performance.

It might not be easy to get all these steps as your daily routine, but here’s how you cold start.

  • Don’t wait for it to happen, take control of your life and make it happen.
  • Have an open mind. No one gets their way 100% of the time. We all have to take the long route eventually. When we do, just go with it. If you hit the typical traffic jam at 6 pm, turn on the radio and enjoy a few songs, instead of moaning and complaining that you will arrive later than expected.
  • As mentioned above, learn from mistakes! Use them as lessons
  • Set goals, make checklists. People that do tend to earn twice as much compared to people who don’t!

    start making a change
    start making a change
  • Don’t look for people to comfort you. Accept the way you are. True strength comes from yourself, not from others telling you how great you are to reassure you!
  • Avoid stress as it makes it harder for you to focus and keep your emotions under boundaries. Better yet, get rid of stress like I wrote here!

Try keeping these small points in mind at all times and soon enough you will be part of the successful people.

As you know, success is a process that doesn’t happen over night.

Here I outlined several points how you can start incorporating positive thinking to change your life.

If you want to change something within yourself, that will be the first step!

How Will Positive Attitude Make Me Wealthy?

Why do I put such importance on positive thinking? Simple! Any truly wealthy person is also a very happy person.

If a trader makes a huge loss for instance and beats himself up for it, he will only make more mistakes, in order to redeem his massive loss.

The same goes for gamblers.

When I first stepped a foot into a casino, I lost my initial bet. Instead of calling it a night, I went to cash out the same amount of money and tried to get that back.

Once I lost that money I was miserable all night and had a bad self-talk all week about it.

When I step a foot into a casino now, I either win a little or lose a little.

Either way I enjoy the experience, because I know beforehand that I will probably lose money and therefore I try to enjoy the experience!

Being wealthy has a lot to do with your mindset.

Once you manage to control your emotions, you will find it easy to resist spending money on tempting objects you don’t need.

You will also take controlled actions instead of reacting with your emotions.

Know Your Enemies

Sometimes it’s hard to realize that some of your closest friends can be your biggest kryptonite.

If you stick to those who keep putting you off from ideas and tell you that investing money is stupid as you don’t benefit from it now, or that working from home isn’t possible and that you’re wasting your time, then you should consider hanging out with other friends.

Negativity can rub off quite easily, if you’re hanging out with the wrong group of people.

Unless you are quite strong minded, you should look for similarly minded people.

There are a lot of entrepreneurs out there who have a lot in common with you.

Bad influence is bad for your positive thinking
Get rid of bad influence

If you find the right group, not only will you be motivating each other and achieve more, you might even end up helping each other or working together.

This is why my goal to set up my online business and generating a passive income through it, is only a doorstep away.

At Wealthy Affiliate, I have an enormous support group and thousands of people, that are constantly available to help me.

Whenever I get stuck with my website or see a new thing I’d like to add to it but don’t know how, all I have to do is ask and within minutes my problem is solved.

The positivity that is projected towards me from everyone is also unbeatable and keeps me going.

I hope that you understood how much more you are capable of, once you set your mind free from negativity.

Being successful is not just a big positive number on your bank account.

It is a state of mind before anything else and positive thinking can change your life.

How are you currently dealing with negativity? Do you constantly beat yourself up for making mistakes or let other people talk you down?

Are you stressed a lot because of your negative attitude? Let me know if this was helpful, if you have any questions or simply wanted to leave me a comment.

I’ll be happy to receive any type of comment and am more than willing to help.

Thanks for reading,



  1. Hey, Esteban! Beautiful article as always. I think this is something we all need to read over and over again to remind us that we need to not be so hard on ourselves. I’m probably the worst at this, and I will be sharing this with my friends. After all, we all need the reminder. Great job, bud!

    • Hey,
      I’m not very easy going with myself either but I have learned to be better!
      Hopefully we can all learn to treat ourselves with more gratitude instead of punishing us nonstop.
      I’d be happy if you’d share this with friends and family 🙂
      Thanks for reading,

  2. hi Esteban
    great post about positive thinking and changing one’s mindset! I used to beat myself up all the time. I went through a lot of stress in the past year and some of it is still ongoing. But I have also learned a lot from mistakes. Sometimes it is trial and error and that is just the way it is. i now take on each challenge by its horn as you say and tackle them one at a time. I don’t get bullied in making rushed decisions. I just see what the lessons are and know that I am strong.

    • Hey Emily,

      I think we all go through a phase where we beat ourselves up unnecessarily. If you go through a lot of stress it can be tough. Have you read my post about stress relief? Maybe this will help you a little. I like hearing that you show your challenges who the real boss is 😉
      I’m sure you’ll be very successful and happier than ever soon.
      Good luck with everything,


  3. It is very refreshing to see such motivating, positive posts! I love how even a phrase like “Know Your Enemy,” which usually has a voice of confrontation, is turned into something positive. Emotional habits are really healthy for you and your success. Get rid of bad ones, and you’re on your way to a positive future in the midst of all that’s perceptibly wrong with the world! Thanks for your words!

    • Hi Raphael,
      Thanks for enjoying my post 🙂
      Positivity can work wonders if applied in your daily life. With a happy mind your usually annoying habits and tasks can be quite entertaining and will be completed more efficiently.
      Don’t thank me for my words, I am glad to share my thoughts and research with you.

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